14 Rules

On occasion, my father sends me an email about something interesting he has read. Last week, he sent one that I particularly enjoyed. It contained a number of "rules" that are attributed to a speech made by Bill Gates of Microsoft fame. 

I had my doubts about the authenticity of the link to Gates and with a little bit of investigation, I found that the original work is by a gentleman named Charles J. Sykes. It appeared in his 1997 book, 50 Rules Kids Won't Learn in School: Real-World Antidotes To Feel-Good Education. See his webpage here.

Advice Columnist Ann Landers has printed the list several times and it was recited at least once by Radio personality Paul Harvey.

All of that aside, the "rules" are interesting to contemplate.

Keep in mind that it was 1997. Here at the first fourteen. The rest you can find here.

Rule No. 1: Life is not fair. Get used to it. The average teen-ager uses the phrase “It’s not fair” 8.6 times a day. You got it from your parents, who said it so often you decided they must be the most idealistic generation ever. When they started hearing it from their own kids, they realized Rule No. 1.

Rule No. 2: The real world won’t care as much about your self-esteem as much as your school does. It’ll expect you to accomplish something before you feel good about yourself. This may come as a shock. Usually, when inflated self-esteem meets reality, kids complain that it’s not fair. (See Rule No. 1)

Rule No. 3: Sorry, you won’t make $40,000 a year right out of high school. And you won’t be a vice president or have a car phone either. You may even have to wear a uniform that doesn’t have a Gap label.

Rule No. 4: If you think your teacher is tough, wait ’til you get a boss. He doesn’t have tenure, so he tends to be a bit edgier. When you screw up, he’s not going to ask you how you feel about it.

Rule No. 5: Flipping burgers is not beneath your dignity. Your grandparents had a different word for burger flipping. They called it opportunity. They weren’t embarrassed making minimum wage either. They would have been embarrassed to sit around talking about Kurt Cobain all weekend.

Rule No. 6: It’s not your parents’ fault. If you screw up, you are responsible. This is the flip side of “It’s my life,” and “You’re not the boss of me,” and other eloquent proclamations of your generation. When you turn 18, it’s on your dime. Don’t whine about it, or you’ll sound like a baby boomer.

Rule No. 7: Before you were born your parents weren’t as boring as they are now. They got that way paying your bills, cleaning up your room and listening to you tell them how idealistic you are. And by the way, before you save the rain forest from the blood-sucking parasites of your parents’ generation, try delousing the closet in your bedroom.

Rule No. 8: Your school may have done away with winners and losers. Life hasn’t. In some schools, they’ll give you as many times as you want to get the right answer. Failing grades have been abolished and class valedictorians scrapped, lest anyone’s feelings be hurt. Effort is as important as results. This, of course, bears not the slightest resemblance to anything in real life. (See Rule No. 1, Rule No. 2 and Rule No. 4.)

Rule No. 9: Life is not divided into semesters, and you don’t get summers off. Not even Easter break. They expect you to show up every day. For eight hours. And you don’t get a new life every 10 weeks. It just goes on and on. While we’re at it, very few jobs are interested in fostering your self-expression or helping you find yourself. Fewer still lead to self-realization. (See Rule No. 1 and Rule No. 2.)

Rule No. 10: Television is not real life. Your life is not a sitcom. Your problems will not all be solved in 30 minutes, minus time for commercials. In real life, people actually have to leave the coffee shop to go to jobs. Your friends will not be as perky or pliable as Jennifer Aniston.

Rule No. 11: Be nice to nerds. You may end up working for them. We all could.

Rule No. 12: Smoking does not make you look cool. It makes you look moronic. Next time you’re out cruising, watch an 11-year-old with a butt in his mouth. That’s what you look like to anyone over 20. Ditto for “expressing yourself” with purple hair and/or pierced body parts.

Rule No. 13: You are not immortal. (See Rule No. 12.) If you are under the impression that living fast, dying young and leaving a beautiful corpse is romantic, you obviously haven’t seen one of your peers at room temperature lately.

Rule No. 14: Enjoy this while you can. Sure parents are a pain, school’s a bother, and life is depressing. But someday you’ll realize how wonderful it was to be a kid. Maybe you should start now. You’re welcome.

I learned many of the things Mr. Sykes discusses at home...from my parents. I'm pretty sure my son is already familiar with the sentiment of each, but I think I'll review with him again to be sure.

Thanks, Dad.

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Busy Week

Basketball News!  

Watch the news coverage

For the first time in school history, both the Parkland College Men's and Women's Basketball teams are headed to Nationals! The PC Women (31-2) defeated Lake Land College 73-65 to win their third straight Region 24 Title and their 20th straight victory.

The Parkland Men's team (21-11) beat John Wood Community College 71-65 to earn their first trip to Nationals since 1994. Congratulations to Coaches Karrie Redeker and Nate Mast.

The Men's games will be played at Danville Area CC and their website www.dacc.edu is loaded with information and updates. The Cobras will face #7 seed Erie CC of Buffalo, NY at 11 am on Wednesday morning. Tournament action will get underway on Tuesday with six of the eight quarterfinal games played on Day 1.

 All games are broadcast live on WDAN 1490 AM Radio and on their internet feed at ihigh.com. Cobrasports.net will broadcast the Men's game on a tape delayed basis.

On the Women's Side, games will be played at Illinois Central College. Parkland is seeded #2 in the upcoming NJCAA D-2 Women's Basketball Tournament and will open action next Tuesday night against North Platte CC of Nebraska. Admission is $10 per day for Adults, $5 for (Senior 65 and over and students 7-12) Children ages 6 and under are free. Cobrasports.net will also broadcast all of the games lives from East Peoria so you can follow along with the action!   Again you can go to www.icc.edu  for more information. 

Master Plan News

Construction has begun on the new Applied Technology Center. If you missed it, there was a groundbreaking ceremony on March 7th. Below is a slideshow with some renderings of what the facility should look like when it is completed. Thanks to the faculty and staff for designing an outstanding structure.

This new facility will house the comprehensive Automotive Programs, Ford ASSET, Collision Repair, Industrial Technology, and Welding. This new construction will be built to LEED gold and is approximately 67,000 SF and is being partially funded by the State of Illinois through the Capital Development Board. A video produced by Chris Foster gives you an idea how it will be used:

The intent is to have the facility ready in spring 2012.

As a reminder, here is the latest schedule for starting and completion of projects related to the Campus Master Plan.

Project	Plan Completion	Construction Starts	Completion
Applied Tech Center	Complete	March. 2011	Apr. 2012
Student Services Center	Oct. 2011	Dec. 2011	Dec. 2013
Fitness Center Addition	Apr. 2011	June 2011	Aug. 2012
Roof Repairs Phase II	Feb. 2011	May 2011	Dec. 2011
Physical Plant Grounds Bldg	Complete	Dec. 2010	Mar. 2011

Board of Trustees, City Council Candidates Forum


The public is invited to hear from the candidates who are running to fill three expiring terms on the Parkland College Board of Trustees, as well as those running for the District 5 seat on the Champaign City Council. A Candidates Forum will be held on Thursday, March 17 from 6 to 9 p.m. at Parkland College in Room W115 (at the Tony Noel Agricultural Technology Applications Center). This event is co-sponsored by the League of Women Voters and the NAACP.

The forum allows voters an opportunity to become better informed about Board of Trustees and city council candidates' positions before the April 5 election. The Board of Trustees candidates include Samuel McGrew, David Thomas, Jonathan Sherrill, James Voyles, Donna Giertz, Dana Trimble, and Greg Knott. The terms of incumbent trustees Giertz, Paul E. Quinlan, and Trimble will expire in April. Each successor trustee will serve for a full six-year term.

When: Thu, Mar 17, 2011 starting at 6:00 PM - 9:00 PM

Where:  Tony Noel Agricultural Technology Applications Center

The Gloria Valenti Award for Compassionate Care

Finally, I'd like to let you know about a special scholarship opportunity:

One man’s gift in appreciation and gratitude for his skilled caregivers will now provide the base for awards for Parkland College health careers students who demonstrate exceptional potential to provide compassionate care to patients and their families.

The first recipients of the Gloria Valenti Awards for Compassionate Care will be named this spring. Nominations are being accepted now through March 31. Awards of $1,000 each will be given annually to students who demonstrate the potential for delivering compassionate care during their training in five Parkland Health Professions categories: 

1) as a certified nursing assistant (CNA); 

2) as an emergency medical services trainee (EMS-Basic); 

3) in a Certificate program; 

4) in an AAS degree program; and 

5) in any Health Professions program, such as nursing, veterinary technology, dental hygiene, or respiratory care.

Anyone in a position to observe the students’ care—faculty, peers, patients, families, or other community residents—may nominate students for Valenti Awards. Nominees for the awards should have provided skilled medical and emotional care and offered sustenance and hope to patients in any of a variety of settings, from hospitals to community-based medical or skilled nursing facilities to private residences. As many as five awards will be presented annually.

The Valenti Award endowment was a bequest from the late Martin Wagner, a longtime Urbana resident, University of Illinois educator, and nationally recognized expert in labor relations. Homebound from 2005 until his death in 2009, Professor Wagner wished both to recognize the high-quality, dignified care he received from area health care professionals who worked together to support him and his family, and to advance the education and training of future caregivers. His splendid caregivers included Diversified Healthcare Services, led by its president, Gloria Valenti, R.N, a leading health care professional in east central Illinois.

Nomination forms for the Award are available online. 

Nominations may be sent via email to Health Professions Department Chair Bobbi Scholze at BScholze@parkland.edu or by mail to:

Department of Health Professions, Attention: Health Professions Chair

Parkland College

2400 West Bradley Ave.

Champaign, IL 61821. 

All nominations must include the name of the student; the program in which the student is enrolled; the circumstances under which the care was delivered; a description of what the student did that demonstrates capacity for compassion and of why the nominator believes the student should receive the award; and the name of and contact information for the nominator.

Nominations accepted through March 31. All Parkland College Scholarships are viewable online here.

Have a great week. Go Cobras!

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Politics Unusual

So a month has gone by and I haven't posted a darn thing. 

It wasn't for lack of things to discuss. But time has a way of slipping by, especially over the last 4 weeks. My travel schedule has been a little hectic and it seems that there is a meeting, a concert, a play, a dinner, or another similar event that reduces the free evenings to very few.

Certainly, it hasn’t been for lack of anything to talk about.

To the contrary, the MAP task force has rendered an opinion, the President has revealed his budget. The Governor followed suit. Pension reform is on the lips of our elected body and community colleges continue to get good press nationally.

On that note, let's get back into the swing of things with a look at what is happening legislatively in our fair state of Illinois. At our February Board of Trustees meeting, I shared a few bills that have been filled in this session that have potential impact on Parkland College.

It appears that the Illinois Senate will consider 2402 bills this session and the House some 2850. Among this collection of certified papers are a number of interesting offerings that may leave some of you scratching your head just as I am.

Sb (Senate Bill) 135 - Tuition Rates set by the Legislature.

Removes the power of the governing board of each public university and community college district to establish tuition rates and fees. Provides that for the 2011-2012 academic year and each academic year thereafter, the tuition and fee rates for students must be equal to the tuition and fee rates in effect for the 2010-2011 academic year or such lesser or greater amount as may be established by law by the General Assembly. Effective immediately. 

Horrible idea. This removes all local authority from our elected Trustees to do what is best for the District.

Sb 59 - Creates the Student Transfer Achievement Reform Act. 

Provides that a public community college student who earns an associate degree for transfer granted pursuant to the Act is deemed eligible for transfer into the baccalaureate program of a State university if the student (1) completes 60 semester units or 90 quarter units that are eligible for transfer to a State university and (2) obtains of a minimum grade point average of 2.0 on a 4.0 scale.

Watch this. Could be interesting.

Hb (House Bill) 152 - Creates Department of Education

Creates the Department of Education Act and amends the Civil Administrative Code of Illinois, the School Code, the Board of Higher Education Act, and the Public Community College Act. Creates the Department of Education, with a Secretary of Education as its head. Provides that, in order to create continuity between all levels of education, the Department shall oversee the State Board of Education, the Board of Higher Education, and the Illinois Community College Board and coordinate and streamline the functions of these boards.

Sure. Exactly what we need…another layer of bureaucracy.

Hb 1503 - Performance funding Fy13.

Amends the Board of Higher Education Act. With respect to the Board's analysis of formulating the annual budget request for State universities and colleges, provides that, beginning with Fiscal Year 2013, the annual budget request must incorporate performance-based funding, pursuant to the report of the Board's Higher Education Finance Study Commission. Provides that the Board shall have 2 fiscal years to implement this performance-based funding, and thereafter must update how this funding is calculated every 6 months.

The jury is still out, but performance funding has not generally accomplished a whole lot is in its inauspicious history. See "Paranormal Academics" to learn how I really feel.

HB 3220 - Higher Ed Accountability

Creates the Accountability in Higher Education Act. Requires public universities in this State to develop annual academic, financial, and enrollment plans that outline (i) tuition and fee estimates, (ii) enrollment projections, (iii) retention policies and projections, and (iv) accepting a number of accountability measures, including meeting benchmarks related to accessibility and affordability. Requires public universities to commit themselves formally to meeting specified State policy objectives, in conjunction with the goals set forth in the Illinois Public Agenda for College and Career Success. Requires the Board of Higher Education to be responsible for developing performance indicators to measure whether public universities in this State are meeting State policy objectives, in conjunction with the goals set forth in the Illinois Public Agenda for College and Career Success. Effective immediately.

FYI, Parkland College has maintained a set of performance indicators since the early 1990s. They have formed the basis of the way the College gauges its effectiveness. Now we may be legally obligated to do what we surely should have rightfully been doing all along.

Hb 3328 – Limits on Dual Credit

Amends the Dual Credit Quality Act. Provides that an institution of higher learning may offer dual credit courses only to high school students in the 12th grade and is prohibited from offering more than 9 semester hours of dual credit courses to those students.

Of all the bills filed this session, this one wins the prize for the worst piece of potential legislation in quite a while.

SB 121 Salary Reduction tied to Audit Results

Amends the Public Community College Act and various Acts relating to the governance of public universities in Illinois. Provides that, with respect to public university audits made by the Auditor General, a board of trustees shall reduce the base salary of the president of the university by 10% for each significant finding in an audit report that is not resolved within one year after receiving the final audit report. Provides that, with respect to community college audits made by an auditor, a board of trustees shall reduce the base salary of the president or chief executive officer of the community college by 10% for each significant finding in an audit report that is not resolved within one year after receiving the final audit report.


Great idea. Really, I mean it.

Lastly, House Speaker Michael Madigan has publically stated that more changes are possible to our (SURS) pension and retiree health benefits -- including the constitutionally problematic possibility that retirement benefits for existing employees could be reduced.

With that, I’ll leave you with this thought:

Under democracy one party always devotes its chief energies to trying to prove that the other party is unfit to rule - and both commonly succeed, and are right. 

 ~H.L. Mencken, 1956