Tips about stuff you already know but occasionally forget

"34% of people surveyed rate their manners as excellent. 80% of people surveyed rate the manners of people in the US as poor"  


-Survey by ORC International


It's amazing and somewhat sad, but in today's world, if you use common courtesy when dealing with your professors, your classmates, and especially prospective employers, you'll more than likely give yourself an edge over the many others who fail to do so.
 
Manners are about showing consideration and using empathy.  But they are also about being connected to a common good; they are about being better.  Respect and consideration are traditionally due to people for all sorts of reasons, some big, some small. 

I realize this seemingly obvious concept is somewhat hard to believe, but it's true. In many ways, we now see so little common courtesy in our respect-starved culture that when we do see it, we're almost stunned by it and most certainly remember it. So as you deal with prospective employers, do the right thing -- and make yourself stand out from the crowd -- by demonstrating your class.

So, what follows are Tom’s tips about stuff you already know but occasionally forget:

At doors

1. Entering or exiting a building: look behind you to see whether anyone else is coming through the same door in the next 5 seconds. If the door will slam in the face of the person behind you, hold it open. 

2. If you see someone right outside and opening the door would involve no more effort than extending your arm, go ahead and give it a push. In particular, let the pizza dude inside, even if it isn’t your pizza. We're lucky to get delivery here.

3. If there are two doors going into a building, and a large number of people are squeezing through one while the other door remains closed, open and go through the unopened door so as to optimize the flow of traffic.

4. If you see someone carrying boxes, ask if there's a door you can open.

5. If you smoke, don't huddle right outside the doors to the building. Nobody wants to walk through a cloud of smoke every time they need to enter or exit. There's been a rule against smoking within 25 feet of a campus building since around 2006, but fear of punishment should not be your sole motivation.

Around campus

1. Say hello to people you meet. If someone else says hello to you, respond in kind. Bonus points for smiling while saying hello. 

2. Say "excuse me" rather than just pushing past people in a crowd or a constricted space. 

3. Wave to, nod, or mouth "thank you" to drivers who stop for you to cross on a pedestrian crossing. It's the law for them to stop, but it's still polite when they do because many don't. Look both ways before you cross the street, even if you're at a crosswalk. 


4. If possible, leave space on the sidewalk so others don't have to walk in water, mud, or snow. If you're walking in a group and one person comes in the opposite direction, move behind someone in your group so the person passing can use the sidewalk as well. And be careful how you maneuver with that umbrella. You almost took my eye out. 

5. If you are innocently walking around campus in a crowd of people and you suddenly see Jack Bauer running after someone and he yells at you to get down, do it. 

In Conversation

1. Don’t interrupt someone while they're talking, no matter how insightful you think what you have to say is. This is one of the rudest things one could do in a conversation, though oftentimes people simply aren't aware that they are guilty of doing it. 

Instead, first make sure they've finished speaking and making their point,  *wait a half-second*, and then go ahead and say what you wanted to say. If you miss your chance because someone else chimed in before you, then oh well, life goes on. What you had to say may not have been as interesting as you think, anyway. 


Online

1. Don't write things in ALL CAPS. or all lowercase, for that matter. Ever. 

2. If you're done using a public computer, close all the windows so people know it's not in use. Log off, unless you want strangers to look through (and potentially modify) your class schedule in my.parkland.edu.

Sustainability

1. If the room is empty, and you're leaving, turn off the lights. Please. 

2. If you go outside to smoke, for crying out loud, throw away your cigarette butts when you're done. Littering is not cool, ever, and this is no exception. 

3. If you have a plastic/glass/aluminum container to toss, but the nearest recycling bin is full, hang onto it until you come to one that isn't full rather than making a pile on top of the bin. The physical plant staff should not have to remove dozens of empty bottles sitting on top of the container before they empty it. 

In class

1. Don't fall asleep in a class. Your professors have put in significant time and effort preparing for class. Nothing could be more disrespectful.

2. When engaged in debate, distinguish between criticisms of your argument and criticisms of your character.
     o Don't make the latter when you're trying to make the former.
     o Don't interpret the former as the latter.


Cell phones

1. Before entering a classroom, a library, a concert, a lecture, a play, or a movie, put your cell phone on vibrate. How about just turn it off or silence it completely? Please.

2. If you are in the library and feel the need to talk to someone on your cellphone, have your conversation in an area where people aren't studying nearby. Also refrain from having loud, long conversations with other people while in the library when people are trying to study around you. 

3. Don't leave your cell phone on a table and then walk away. If it rings or vibrates, it will bother everyone. 

4. If you are in a dark space with others, such as a movie, don't text-message. The light from the screen is bright and very obnoxious. 

Events

1. If you are at a performance of any sort or in the Art Gallery during a lecture, kindly zip it.


2. Do not loudly unwrap throat lozenges in the middle of the music or play. If you have a cough, it's best to unwrap one before the music/play/whatever starts, or during a break in the middle. This can be very hard for someone with say, a cough. Perhaps excusable if you cover your     mouth and try to muffle it. 

3. What seems to be an inconspicuous whisper to you is actually quite loud. 

4. Don't bring small children. 

5. Take off your hat when indoors and during the National Anthem.

6. Did I mention that you should turn off or silence your cell phone?

And finally 20 reasons to show special politeness to other people:

1. They are older.
2. They know more than you do.
3. They know less than you do.
4. They got here first.
5. They have educational qualifications in   the subject under discussion.
6. You are in their house.
7. They once helped you financially.
8. They have been good to you all your life.
9. They are less fortunate than you.
10. They have achieved special status in the wider world.
11. You are serving them in a shop.
12. They are in the right.
13. They are your boss.
14. They work for you.
15. They are a policeman/ teacher/ doctor/judge.
16. They are in need.
17. They are doing you a favor.
18. They paid for the tickets.
19. You phoned them, not the other way around.
20. They have a job that entails service to you.


Please feel free to add your thoughts in the comments.


Thanks.


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